Well, i'm supposed to talk about the pizza i made during the weekend as promised in the <coming up next> post. But i just had a fight with my mum and would like to complain about it for a bit.
Well, my mum is an old-fashion v disciplined madam. She likes to view things as only RIGHT and WRONG. So yes, she judges everything she sees everyone she meets in her heart. We used to get into a lot of quarrels. By that i mean A LOT. We used to fight every single day when i was in high school, not so much in uni as i was away from home. And now when i came back from overseas, i seriously can't stand her. One of the reason is that i can't face the fact that she is getting older and act like a crazy old woman. She used to be a wise person, good manners, have good relationship with her colleagues. Now, she only mixes with 60+ year old people. She has no more friends at her age due to her attitude. I wanted to make her realizes that she can't make it a habit to correct everyone when people say something negative. It's like she wants to be this moral police and blow whistle when people say something that she doesn't agree with. She's like the politician who has hold the power for too long and getting terrified that people AKA me might overpower her. Well, that's how life goes on! When you're old, you admit it and pass over the decision maker position to other people. She just couldn't take it.
Anyway, what happen just now was i trying to reorganise my cupboard in the washroom, then i realize she has lots of unused rubbish (or maybe not) in the cupboard which makes it very messy and crowded. So i took out her stuffs and shift all to the small living area where she stored hundreds of hotel toiletries collected by my dad and her. She got angry and said i shouldn't throw away her stuff without asking her and nagged for 10 minutes (?). Well i didn't say anything as i wasn't prepared to quarrel. Silence is golden. Totally applicable to my situation. Then, she came into the bathroom. So i started to defend myself. I wasn't throwing her stuff, i was merely shifting them to another place and when i finish everything i'll ask her if she still want those stuff. Well, she definitely didn't agree with me as she starts rising her voice saying i should ask her to come pick up her stuff instead of shifting them by myself cos I'm being rude. Ok, I DON'T UNDERSTAND. This is my room, and somehow she storing her unused stuff in my room is perfectly ok and i CAN'T TOUCH THEM?! She said i wasn't using the room when i was in uni so she store everything in my room, and now as i'm back, I SHOULD INFORM HER I NEED TO USE THE SPACE IN MY ROOM then she'll arrange her stuff to other place. I'm totally lost. And then after a few more sentences by her, i get it. What she meant was: THAT WAS NOT MY ROOM, IT WAS HERS!
Well, i guess she still wants to be in control of every single tiny unimportant things in this freaking house. When she lost it she'll scream and shout and snatch everything back. I'm not sure if it's pathetic or crazy. And guess what, this incidents just show like 1/100 of her.
Thought i'll go crazy sooner or later. DAMN.
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Another fight goes on. I'm not a freaking thoughts detector or some psychic, so stop acting like you're disappointed when i didn't do stuff that you think i should do IN YOUR BRAIN. If you want me to do something, JUST SAY IT! Just face it, we are not a perfect family so stop fantasizing me and dad to be perfect daughter and perfect husband. We are normal humans not ACTORS. And what? I can't even complain to myself when i'm frustrated? Fine, i'll find somewhere you can't hear to complain. The problem is, YOU ARE EVERYWHERE!
Now i have a headache because anger is over-filling my brain.
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